I probably broke some promises on my way out. I keep looking back. Repeating each conversation in my head. Im not one to make promises. But in the middle of all my emotions I tend to lose control. Im sure you saw the signs that said road work ahead. It was never a secret that I wasnt completely paved, that there were open holes, and unpainted lanes. I warned you, I did. But I should have stopped you instead.
Maybe i should stop smiling at everyone. Maybe.. but when i was a little girl i read that a smile could change someones day and i thought i wanna be that i wanna be the reason for someone to smile. But it was a lie wasnt it. Just like everything else. It was a lie a smile from a stranger is just another strangers smile. And a kiss on a scrape won’t make it heal faster. And i’m good are just two words put together so that you dont ask questions. It was a lie wasn’t it.
Some days I feel like the bird, the bird keeper set free. It didn’t need to roam the world to see that the only place in the world it wanted to be was there. Or maybe it was afraid. I’m like a bird. Except I think I lost my sense of direction. Maybe I left it in the cage the day you set me free, because there’s days when I can’t figure out which way is North. & I cant seem to remember whether I’m supposed to head north or south for the winter. I’m sure its north for the winter… Isn’t it? You set me free and told me: fly away baby. But I flew in a circle and came right back to you. Where do I go if my soul mourns when its not near you.
For valentines day I want a real guy to actually treat me like I at least matter and I’m not merely a disposable object here to serve for their pleasure.
Yeah, that’d be pretty cool, but I also wouldn’t mind a bouquet of bacon & a baby unicorn.
You only want that for one day?
Be careful with the things you say. Words are dangerous weapons. You could be tried as a innocent murderer. A reckless tongue that’s all that is needed to be found guilty.
I should let go. Every morning I wake up and I promise you today is the day. Im letting go, I promise. And yet here I am falling back into you.
I should really let you go.
I’m not safe. There are glitches in my soul. Falling in love with me could be dangerous. I should have told you that from the get go. I didn’t know your feelings were growing so strong if I had I would have ran away a long time ago. Im in love with you, babe. And all I could think was falling in love with the wrong person can be such a dangerous thing. You could have handed me a beating heart and I would have been less hysterical. Maybe it was inevitable, like a car crash it all happens in slow motion from the outside, you can see step by step the chain reaction; but from the inside its all so fast there’s nothing that could stop it.
((: you dont even know how happy that made me! thatnk you!
I bet you never knew that I used to dream of the end. I bet you never saw the darkness eating me up inside. I bet you let my smile fool you. I bet you told yourself she must be tired. The end used to seem so much better. Quieter. I bet you never knew. You never seemed too interested in my day.
I noticed you. You come in every morning around eight. You ask for a cup of coffee and you go to your regular spot back next to the restrooms near the window. I watched you my first day here. i was curious about you. i didn’t want to believe you were who I thought.
I didn’t think anyone noticed me anymore. Someday’s i feel completely invisible. as if the world has forgotten me, i guess i wouldn’t blame them I’ve forgotten me.Could it be that I’m still the person i once was? did the world forget him too.?
There’s this saying, it says we exist because someone else thinks about us,not vissa verssa. So maybe Someone thought of you this morning as you woke to a new day. Maybe someone was praying for you as you walked into Mcdonald’s to ask for your morning coffee before the rest of you day started. Maybe..
She doesn’t want to be told she’s beautiful. She just wants someone to hold her together when shes falling apart. She doesn’t need words. She needs action. Words are nothing but scribbles that will eventually be forgotten, like those ancient languages written in the cave walls.
I told you I was going to go to sleep but I didn’t; I guess that makes me a liar. I couldn’t lay my head to rest. It kept spinning. So I sat up writing. That’s something you should know about me. I write. Not always though, you should probably worry when I am. It means there’s something wrong in there. You can ask you know; I won’t hide it, not after you see it. I hope you know what your getting yourself into.
I always used to say I’ll never fall in love. And then I fell in love. And then I fell out and it hurt so I said it again. I don’t know how people do it, or maybe there is something wrong with me. I fall in love so easily. My heart is so willing.
I still look up at the sky on days and wonder whether those trails left by planes are really just vapor. Conspiracy theories are intriguing cause humankind is really that evil. Maybe thats why I still can’t believe that God really sent you. I keep looking for a dent in the making. I still search for a reason to run the other way screaming. So I guess you could say; what little faith you have. But the truth is: that’s how evil humankind is. We hold onto the darkness and embrace it as if it were light. Our evil hearts ask and ask for more and they never get their fill. So yes I keep searching for a reason to run the other way.
but please, prove me wrong…
She did things cause she had to. I don’t think I ever saw her do anything because she wanted to.
No there is no time, no money for the I want to’s in life. Life is all work no pleasure. Life is hardwork, there’s no time for games. No there is no time to slow down, time is money. Maybe but that my friend is called survival not life. “I have found that there is nothing greater than to find pleasure, and to do good in this life.”